1. His Good Conduct Ribbon has a “V” on it..
2. Says the Government “lost” his service records so they won’t have to reveal the secret missions he was on, which is why he can’t wear his MOH.
3. His 12 rows of ribbons include the WWI Victory Medal.
4. Modestly claims he served with SOG, the “Special Operations Group” in Vietnam.
5. Has a harrowing story of how on his first day in country, he had to kill two “gooks” walking point on a patrol into Cambodia.
6. Can’t seem to remember what unit he served with, below the division level—if that—or just where he was in Nam. (I was all over!)
7. Says he enlisted in the Air Force, but was trained at Marine Corps Basic Training at Camp LeJeune by Marine Drill Sergeants for special service with the Seals.
8. Appears to have been born about 1965.
9. His MOS of “Bandsman” was just a cover for the secret missions he was running in both North Korea and North Vietnam.
10. Starts telling you about the atrocities he committed.
11. Can’t remember his MOS, the names of anyone he served with, or which C-Rats had the big can main meals.
12. You show him your John Wayne and he doesn’t know what it is.
13 The reason the other POWs never heard of him is he was held in a separate camp because he knew too much.
Okay, this is intended as humor for vets, but I’ve come across pathetic people with five of these cues. Really.